The Postcard

Last week, I sent my friend Sandy (of the new hit blog, "A Life Told In Lols," formerly of "Blog de la Revolution"-now defunct-) a postcard. When Sandy got it, she accused me of having a filthy mind. She said that her mailman is going to think she's a pervert.

It seems, Ladies and Gentlemen, that on the postcard I sent, someone drew a small penis (small only when compared to the gigantic balls beneath).

I didn't draw it. Let me make that clear. I really don't even know how to draw a penis. Moreover, there was a year or two in my youth when I was genuinely afraid of being asked to draw one (having not yet seen the thing on which to base my illustration). I imagined people laughing hysterically. "That's not what it looks like!" That childhood fear has, I think, prevented me from ever ever sketching genitals.

Also, the dick in question was done in a different color ink than my harmless "Hi from Montana, Sandy." So it couldn't have been me.

She agreed and we laughed. The matter would have been dropped, except later I thought...

I brought the postcard directly to the post office. I put it in a mailman's hand. And, when Sandy promptly received it, it had never once been out of the watchful eye of the United States Postal Service.

In conclusion: This was a high rank, government peen sketch. And I can now comfortably say to the culprit: You wildly misrepresented the testicals.