Reason #268 why its good to be married:

...legal representation
Today, AP will go to court to argue on my behalf in the case of Big Green versus the Son-of-a-Bitch parking garage policeman and his faulty ticket-giving (otherwise known as Me versus THE MAN).

I know we will win because husband wore a suit today. For, one can only infiltrate THE MAN from deep inside, but not in a gay way.